phosphorescentt:

gillianandersons:

do you ever realize that there was a moment when your mom or dad put you down as a baby and never picked you up again

I told my mom about this and she walked over and picked me up I am a 22 year old adult woman

(Source: mulders, via lovewhenthereisnone)

thenorsebros:

if i die before my favorite show ends then use an ouija board to keep me updated about what happens next

(via lovewhenthereisnone)

guy:

sorry i only like people that i never have a chance with

(Source: guy, via dad-hat)

hate:

i’m so afraid of marriage like what if you marry someone and like have kids with them and then they decide they don’t love you anymore or something idk man but that shit is scary

(via kiss-d0lphinsx)

pussyclestroyer:

sexting like

 image

(via t-ketotheskies)

poetic:

is it just me or do you think it’d be helpful if they showed a model in the size you were looking for when you’re trying to shop online, like yes that looks great in size small but what about the other sizes 

(via f3ar-nothing)

shaxaphone:

cute things to call your girlfriend:

1. sugar 
2. honey 
3. flour 
4. egg 
5. 1/2lb butter 
6. stir 
7. pour into pan 
8. preheat to 375°

(via kiss-d0lphinsx)

sniffing:

do u ever accidentally slam the door on your parents after an argument and then have to sit there praying to god to help u through the ensuing shit storm that you know is about to go down

(via kiss-d0lphinsx)

meladoodle:

juilan:

My ears. They are ringing.

are u gonna answer em

(via seanp0donnell)